Divorce Update

Originally posted 3/19/2010


Still getting divorced. I am perhaps a tad more aware of my ex’s behavior and feelings for this situation, which is essentially the same as my understanding when I began these proceedings, only more specific. He is as aloof to reality as he ever has been, and unfortunately there is nothing I can do about that, if I could change that at all, we probably wouldn’t be in our current situation.
I am almost beyond caring that he blames me entirely for the contemptuous divorce we now find ourselves in. There really is nothing to be done about it: I can’t convince him otherwise and I’m happy I don’t have to try. With all honesty, there is nothing I can say that would change his mind because he KNOWS he’s right. :) So, I suppose the next step is to sit back and enjoy the ride. I’m sure there will be many more obsessive, overreacting phone calls from el husband to my loved ones (possibly my attorney) in the future...
The solution to that problem seems easy...don’t answer the phone! Tho that inevitably leads to the threatening voicemail indicating that if he doesn’t receive a return phone call it would make him “take other action.” After such a message the irritation at his presumption inevitably makes way for the laughter and we move on and wait for his next mental lapse. The joke being that we both presumably want what is best for our children and are doing what we can to facilitate that...sigh. What a cluster-fuck!
Yet, here I sit, still happier to be getting divorced and going through these shenanigans than remaining in that marriage. I know I am making the right decision.
All I want is for my kids to be happy, healthy little people, and I am willing to negotiate, mediate, conciliate.
Message to the ex: WE ARE GETTING DIVORCED BECAUSE OUR MARRIAGE WAS NOT WORKING. LETS AT LEAST MAKE THE DIVORCE WORK SO WE CAN HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP FOR OUR KIDS. AND NO...THAT IS NOT WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING UP TO THIS POINT. MY BEST ADVICE (BECAUSE I KNOW YOU’RE DYING TO HEAR IT) IS TO STOP BEHAVING AS THOUGH YOUR PRIDE HAS BEEN INJURED. GOOD-LUCK TO THE BOTH OF US.